Fears

I've been meaning to do this post for a little while, and I hope that I can do so in the right way.  You see, it is important sometimes to acknowledge our fears so that we can take a closer look at them and realize that they may not be that scary after all.  Fear all really stems from one thing: the unknown, think about it and you will recognize that most of your fears will come from, at least in part, the fact that you don't know how things will be.

What are some of my fears in going to Mexico?  First of all one of my major fears is not being able to communicate well.  I am still learning the language and I don't want to be stuck inside my head surrounded by people that I don't understand.  I am practicing Spanish everyday, and I am overall not too concerned, however I do sometimes wonder what hinderences will bar my path because of my inability to express myself fluently or understand others completely.

I suppose this stems from not know the full extent of my Spanish abilities, coupled with me not know how well I will be able to understand the native speakers there.  There are a few things I can do about this: first, I need to get a better understanding of my speaking level.  This is tied to the idea that I need to create a better study plan to acquire the Spanish language.  Second I need to practice my ability to understand native speakers.

Both of these problems are primarily solved by practicing speaking with people from Mexico, and I am lucky that I have a few Mexican friends.  But I can also practice comprehension by watching movies in Spanish and practice speaking by setting a certain amount of time each day that I will speak Spanish with my roommate or class mates or others.  Lastly, I can always ask for help and advice from a large group of friends that served foreign language missions and have more skills and experience in language acquisition than myself.

So... that's the plan (rule the world).  It's simple right?

Benjamin

Individualism: Ser, o no ser.

Reading about the Ophelia Syndrome (accepting the framework of being told how to think/act or what is important to learn) really made me think a lot about my education and everything that I am learning in school.  Quite fittingly I heard today that Mark Twain, among his many other witty words, said "Don't let school interfere with your education." I think there is a lot of truth in that. He also said "If God had meant for us to be naked, we'd have been born that way," but that seems a little less relevant.

But seriously, there are the things that we are going to college, and paying tuition, to learn, and then there are the hoops that we need to jump through in order to get the grade we need.  Usually they are unrelated.  It is unfortunate that so much of our time is spent jumping through these hoops that we don't learn the truly valuable lessons like what type of people we are and what is important to us.

Now I understand that my field study is not supposed to be this amazing "self-realization" experience, and I will be focusing outward and seeking to learn about the culture that surrounds me, but I think that overcoming the Ophelia Syndrome for field studies is completely applicable.  In order for me, or anyone, to be successful in learning about others and their culture they must first understand themselves.

We have talked a lot in class about recognizing "the water that we swim in" or the cultural views that we take for granted and then trying to compensate for them.  But it is also important for us to understand who we are personally so that we can see where we are coming from that personal standpoint.  And the better that I understand myself and what I want to learn, and how I can best learn, the better I will be at learning those things and completing a successful and meaningful field study.

 Sometimes the most difficult search we will conduct as Sherlock is trying to find out who we really are.  It's as Ezra Taft Benson has said: "Some of the greatest battles will be fought within the silent chambers of your own soul."